Author/Artist: becisvolatile
Title: Coffee
Challenge: Short Challenge
Prompt used: Must start with the phrase "No one would guess ..."
Rating & Warnings: PG
Summary: Even waiting for a coffee has become such a Herculean task that she's not sure she'll last much longer...
Author's/Artist's Note: A big 'Hi there!' to everyone. This is my first attempt here, I'm just keen to get some creative juices flowing.


( Coffee )

Who actually watched Caprica? Is it worth checking out?

Still very much deployed. Not long now until I get home.

So very over this deployment thing!

Overheard the tail end of a Petty Officer talking to a recruit: "...So if you ever see a pelican getting ready to take a crap, get the fuck out of the way." Words to live by, I think.

Okay, so yes. I ran away and joined the Navy. People do crazy shit all the time. It doesn't suck as much as you might imagine...

This isn't like the movies. At first it sucked MAJOR arse, but then (as ordered by my leader) I took a teaspoon of cement and hardened the fuck up. Now I only cry every *other* night. Okay, that's a lie I only cried once, after I finished shakedown (full on day of running, sand crwling and you don't even want to know what else) and only because everyone had been so gosh darn nice.

I feel sooo terrbile that I haven't been in touch sooner, I did draft a lot of letters/emails but never got further than maybe a sentence or two before getting a fire drill, pipe to muster on the parade ground or my leading hand on the warpath.

So what have I been doing? Too much to list all of it, so I'll give you a glimpse at today:

0430: Wakey wakey
0455: EMA (Early morning activity) aka shitloads of running and pushups. Joy.
0600: Hit the showers for a nanosecond.
0615: Brekkie, 10 minutes to get my food and eat.
0645: Cleaning stations. I scrubbed the loos. Highly sought after job. No, really.
0730: Morning instruction (sexual offences and wills briefs).
0734: Rct Bec is yelled at and forced to stand at attention in the back of the lecture hall for taking one very long blink.
0921: Dear god will this brief ever end.
0930: Innoculations. Two hours of standing in line waiting for three more (already had the first three on Monday) vaccinations.
And so the day went on.

The good news is that as of next week we'll be the intermediate class (and week after that a new Div will arrive and we won't be the babies of Recruit School). It also means that we start outside instruction and for me that means I start Steyr (rifle) training on Monday. Why yes, that *does* mean that they will allow me to be armed at some stage.

I am now also fully kitted out in a sailor suit and kick-arse cams. Seriously, you don't want to mess with me. I could march all over your arse.

Getting mail and letters here is pretty much the pinnacle of our day so if you want to write to me drop me a line at kamikazekangaroo[at]hotmail[dot]com and I'll hook you up with my snail mail address.

In other news, how are you all keeping yourselves?

Hey
How is everyone?

So we just had a farewell lunch at work for me.

Four people showed up.

And while I appreciate that I work at a newspaper and half an hour prior a car had jumped the gutter and taken out two bystanders... well it still sucks to be me.

I think (barring a couple awesome mates I've made) it's probably the right thing for me to do, moving on, I mean.

And 'Hi all!' have I missed any impotant developments? Lemme know!

Things Bec has learned in her duties as a sub-editor:

1. Spell check really is beyond the capabilities of some people. It just is.
2. Big words won’t make you sound smart. But they will provoke much lol-age around my office when I tell everyone how you tried to use the word ‘unequivocally’. That word does not mean what you think that word means.
3. It didn’t ‘commence’. It ‘started’.
4. Everyone hates the sub.
5. Some fucker ate sushi over my keyboard while I was away last week. I know this because there is rice and salmon between my ‘d’ and ‘f’ keys.
6. To the ‘press secretary’ from the local hospital’s ladies auxiliary: No, I will not give your morning tea a more noticeable section in the diary dates. They’re diary dates and thus chronological, it’s not my fault it’s listed between the Sweet Seductions sex toy party and that Sad Dads meeting.
7. It isn’t wise to tell the local hospital’s ladies auxiliary ‘press secretary’ to ‘suck it’. Especially not if she is the next-door neighbour of the regional manager.
8. Nobody cares that ‘I went to university for this shit’.
9. And, lets be honest, I went to university to get laid. Lots.
10. You can put all the exclamation marks you want into your copy. I will gleefully delete them.
11. It is not cute when a hung-over sports journalist decides to write an entire article in lolcat speak. You ‘can not has’ a by, you dick.
12. The quickest way to finalise a layout is to actually complete the original one, then be told that there’s been a late addition – thus rendering all of your subbing and layout completely and utterly fucking useless.
13. While it is true that as a sub people are required to occasionally do as I ask, it is neither fair nor funny for me to send the office junior looking for a ‘left handed rule’. And even if it was, we’re electronic, I don’t use a rule. And I’m not left handed. And there’s no such thing.

Title: Inherit the Earth
Authors: becisvolatile
Rating: PG
Characters: Lee/Kara
Genre: Drabble
Summary: … No single wonder could touch upon the challenge held in the kick of her eyebrow.
Disclaimer: Fiction, based on fiction belonging to someone who is not me. (But is apparently a really fucking big tool.)
Notes: I am still grumpy. And I still fucking hate RDM. And kittens.

( Inherit the Earth )